Still waiting

We turned in our application to adopt a 4th child just over 3 months ago. I felt certain we would have a referral long before now, but we are still waiting. Although this process is not new to us, for some reason this wait has been particularly difficult. Many times I have questioned whether we are making the right decision, but Jesse assures me this is my defense mechanism- If I can't have what I want now, I no longer want it. In the past week, I have begun to realize what the real problem is...I can't take the emotional rollercoaster. Everytime the phone rings I jump, only to be disappointed when it's not Dillon. I know our baby is out there and he/she will come to us at just the right time, but that doesn't make it any easier. Hoping my next post brings good news.